Secret Pipe Fitter Clubs

Paid subscribers are slapping their foreheads now. “What the heck is he trying to get away with now?” they asked themselves. Everybody needs a chuckle. If you were a paid subscriber you would be on the joke. Paid subscribers know that I am being incredibly ridiculous. Consider the source.

Some of my best friends are plumbers.

Get this. I was just clued in that there are secret pipe fitter clubs scattered all over the city. I do not know any addresses. My source is unsure I would be welcome. I don’t lay pipe for a living. It is impossible to tell what I do for a living, aside from live. This is New Orleans. Live and let live.

You know I love to know things nobody else knows. It is eating me up inside, where these possible pipe fitter clubs might be. It is eating me up inside like cunnilingus, or tapeworm. My source will not tell me.

“Mr. King, the last thing I want is to walk into my favorite pipe fitter club and see you reading the Wall Street Journal at the bar.”

I don’t know why. Most people find me good company.

I said, “I drive around Mid-City and Tremé, and I look at these houses and I think, this might be one of this secret pipe fitter clubhouses.”

“Yep,” my source said, “That’s pretty much what it’s like. We go inside to fit pipes together. We know what we’re doing. It’s a trade secret.”

This is New Orleans.

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