The Stink of Uptown Was Thick Last Night.
Ever since I was a small child I have wondered what Zira, from the original Planet of the Apes, would look like with long hair and a ponytail. As of today, I now know. She is beautiful.
Do you remember that scene in the Original Planet of the Apes when Taylor, played by Charleton Heston, shaved and Cornelius said it made him look less civilized and Zira said it made him look so damed ugly?
This morning I was talking with the street preacher at the donut shop. He and I were talking strategies to keep warm when it is 46 degrees Fahrenheit, which is was this morning. The street preacher also rides a Vespa. I helped him arrange it and he and I serve as a source of motor scooter advice for him. He has only been a vesparado for a few months, while your humble narrator was born directly into the saddle of his steel pony.
Rudy was eavesdropping. Rudy likes to sit at the far end of the counter, by the saloon doors that protect the video slot machines from children’s eyes.
Rudy is still shaving his head. His head looks like a luth turtle’s from behind, all leathery, stubbly folds. I still tell him he looks good. At least he is clean shaven. We can only play the cards we are dealt. I, also, like Rudy, do not put a lot of effort into how I appear from behind.
Let the chips fall where they may.
It was still dark out when I was at the donut shop, talking to Rudy and the street preacher. There was a new lady behind the counter. Her hair was thin and combed into repeating esses all along her scalp line until it got thicker. I had never met her before. Ssssssss.
Rudy said he is going to keep shaving the top of his head but he is thinking about growing a beard. The street preacher already has a beard. I told Rudy that if he grows a beard, I will grow one, too.
Have you ever been to Cane & Table? It is in the French Quarter. Craft cocktails with food. Bruce Willis has eaten there. Guy Fieri has not.
There was a stink in my part of New Orleans last night. It wafted from Uptown. I am going to talk about that next to the paid subscribers. It should prove to be more interesting than anything above.
Now, I am going to talk about a horrible stink. Consider a paid subscription to learn the rest of the story as it unfolds.